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The Anger Workbook for Christian Parents

ISBN: 978-0-7879-6903-5
272 pages
March 2004, Jossey-Bass
The Anger Workbook for Christian Parents (0787969036) cover image
In this practical book, anger experts Drs. Les Carter and Frank Minirth–coauthors of the bestselling The Anger Workbook–show families how the "blame game" (parents blame the kids and kids blame the parents) doesn’t work. Instead they provide insight for dealing with the root causes of anger. In a perfect blend of biblical wisdom and psychological research, they show readers how to understand what can be right about anger, distinguish between healthy and unhealthy anger, recognize how anger can be managed more successfully by controlling desires and insecurities and addressing other underlying issues, and much more. Filled with real-life examples, checklists, evaluation tools, and study questions, this valuable resource for any parent with a preteen or teenager will help parents understand and manage their children’s anger–as well as their own–and show how to create harmony at home.

 

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Preface and Acknowledgments.

Twelve Steps Toward Anger Management for Parents.

1. The Purpose of Anger.

Step 1: Learn to identify what is behind the expression of anger, and make that a primary focus.

2. How Anger Is Mismanaged.

Step 2: Be aware of the ways you may choose to handle anger poorly, so you can be specific in your efforts to improve.

3. Healthy Ways to Manage Anger.

Step 3: When you have a responsible message to communicate, do so in a way that upholds the dignity of the others involved.

4. Breaking Your Cycles of Dependency.

Step 4: Have a strong sense of purpose as a parent in order to respond to anger-producing circumstances as an initiator, not a reactor.

5. Dropping Excessive Control.

Step 5: Realize that the best way to be in control is to diminish control tactics, speaking instead about choices.

6. The Struggle for Superiority.

Step 6: Refuse to lord over your child, but speak instead as one who believes in the equal worth of each family member.

7. Anger as an Ego Trip.

Step 7: Let humility be your guide as you demonstrate to your children that selfishness has no place in successful anger management.

8. Dropping Defenses.

Step 8: Don’t be threatened by an adversarial response, but be confident in your own response.

9. Establishing Boundaries.

Step 9: Respect the fact that each family member is responsible for his or her choices.

10. Myths That Perpetuate Anger.

Step 10: Identify the false assumptions that feed your anger, and let truth guide your decisions in discipline.

11. Displaced Anger.

Step 11: Identify your own outside stressors that create anger, and choose to address them separately, as opposed to bringing them into parental communication.

12. The Overcomer’s Mind-Set.

Step 12: Set aside an attitude of defeat, and recognize that in each situation you can choose to be an overcomer.

Appendix.

Anger, Teenagers, and Medication.

The Authors.

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Dr. Les Carter is a nationally known psychotherapist at the Minirth Clinic in Richardson, Texas, where he has practiced since 1980. He has authored or coauthored seventeen books including The Anger Trap from Jossey-Bass.
Dr. Frank Minirth is president of the Minirth Clinic, which he founded in 1975. The author or coauthor of more than fifty books, he is featured on "Life Perspectives" with Don Hawkins, a national program currently on fifty-five stations, and on "American Family Radio," currently on two hundred radio stations in America.
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"...aims to reduce anger and frustration within families." (Publishers Weekly, February 9, 2004)

"Parents will recognize themselves in this book. 'That's me, been there, and said that.' In easily implemented steps, the authors provide insightful, practical suggestions for changing the anger factor in family interactions."
—Dr. Garry L. Landreth, Regents professor and director, Center for Play Therapy, University of North Texas

"Les Carter and Frank Minirth give you all you need to know about how to use this dicey emotion to your advantage so that you become the parent you want to be. As a parent of two boys, I found this resource invaluable and I know you will too."
—Les Parrott, Ph.D., author, High-Maintenance Relationships

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