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How to Listen so Parents Will Talk and Talk so Parents Will Listen

ISBN: 978-1-118-01296-3
304 pages
June 2011
How to Listen so Parents Will Talk and Talk so Parents Will Listen (1118012968) cover image
"In keeping with person-centered theory and therapy, John and Rita Sommers-Flanagan have produced a book that will be immensely helpful for professionals who work with parents. Throughout the pages, there are many examples of practitioners honoring and respecting parents and listening deeply to how best be of help. I am delighted that this book continues to echo and expand on my father's work."
Natalie Rogers, PhD, REAT, author, The Creative Connection and The Creative Connections for Groups

"Because parenting can be such a dizzying task, professionals working with parents need to have intelligible, compassionate, and ethical principles to guide their work. John and Rita Sommers-Flanagan have mastered this complex terrain, and we are fortunate, in this articulate and accessible book, to gain from their exceptional experience and wisdom."
Andrew Peterson, EdD, author, The Next Ten Minutes: 51 Absurdly Simple Ways to Seize the Moment

Step-by-step guidance for building healthy dialogues with parents that open communication and promote positive outcomes

Embracing the uniqueness of every parent, family situation, and practitioner, How to Listen so Parents Will Talk and Talk so Parents Will Listen helps professionals address the parent-child problems that families often find puzzling or challenging and for which they seek support and guidance.

How to Listen so Parents Will Talk and Talk so Parents Will Listen features many specific interventions and methods for helping parents implement developmentally appropriate and scientifically supported strategies for building healthy parent-child relationships and working through the most common conflicts encountered in families. It includes:

  • Tips for creating a positive therapist-client experience with parents

  • Guidelines for working with a variety of parents

  • Parenting tip sheets and homework assignments

  • Case studies focusing on many different parenting problems, including the strong-willed child, divorce, homework battles, spanking, and more

How to Listen so Parents Will Talk and Talk so Parents Will Listen will help you develop positive relationships with parents so that constructive two-way dialogue can be established. Even the most difficult and resistant parents can be successfully engaged through the helpful strategies, advice, and tools found in this practical guide.

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Case Examples ix

Preface xi

PART ONE: UNDERSTANDING AND BEING WITH PARENTS

CHAPTER ONE A Way of Being With Parents 3

CHAPTER TWO Preparing Yourself to Work Effectively With Parents 17

CHAPTER THREE What Parents Want: A Model for Understanding Adult Influence 33

PART TWO: STRATEGIES FOR WORKING WITH PARENTS

CHAPTER FOUR From Initial Contact to Assessment: Building and Maintaining a Working Relationship With Parents 57

CHAPTER FIVE Collaborative Problem Formulation 75

CHAPTER SIX Creating and Providing Guidance, Advice, and Solutions 93

PART THREE: PRACTICAL TECHNIQUES FOR PARENTING CHALLENGES

CHAPTER SEVEN Teaching Relationship-Based Interventions to Parents 113

CHAPTER EIGHT Sharing Power to Gain Influence: Indirect and Problem-Solving Interventions 133

CHAPTER NINE A New-and-Improved Behaviorism: Child-Friendly but Direct Approaches to Discipline 153

CHAPTER TEN Ongoing Contact, Complications, and Referrals 177

CHAPTER ELEVEN Dealing With Special Situations and Issues 195

Appendix A: An Annotated Bibliography of Parenting Books 209

Appendix B: Tip Sheets for Parents 217

Appendix C: Parent Satisfaction and Counselor Reflection Inventory 229

Appendix D: Master List of Attitudes, Strategies, and Interventions 233

Appendix E: Chapter Checklists 235

Appendix F: Parent Homework Assignments 241

References 261

Author Index 271

Subject Index 275

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John Sommers-Flanagan, PhD, is an Associate Professor in the Department of Counselor Education at The University of Montana. He serves as a psychological consultant with Trapper Creek Job Corps, a vocational and educational facility. His research interests include clinical interviewing, parent consultations, and adolescent psychotherapy.

Rita Sommers-Flanagan, PhD, is a Professor in the Department of Counselor Education at The University of Montana. She provides mental health consultation at the Missoula Vet Center and Trapper Creek Job Corps. She has taught and written in the area of applied, practical ethics for the past fifteen years.

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"In keeping with person-centered theory and therapy, John and Rita Sommers-Flanagan have produced a book that will be immensely helpful for professionals who work with parents. Throughout the pages, there are many examples of practitioners honoring and respecting parents and listening deeply to how best be of help. I am delighted that this book continues to echo and expand on my father's work."
Natalie Rogers, PhD, Distinguished Consulting Faculty, Saybrook University, author, The Creative Connection: Expressive Arts as Healing

"Because parenting can be such a dizzying task, professionals working with parents need to have intelligible, compassionate, and ethical principles to guide their work. John and Rita Sommers-Flanagan have mastered this complex terrain, and we are fortunate, in this articulate and accessible book, to gain from their exceptional experience and wisdom."
Andrew Peterson, EdD, author, The Next Ten Minutes: 51 Absurdly Simple Ways to Seize the Moment

See More
“In keeping with person-centered theory and therapy, John and Rita Sommers-Flanagan
have produced a book that will be immensely helpful for professionals who work with
parents. Throughout the pages, there are many examples of practitioners honoring and
respecting parents and listening deeply to how best be of help. I am delighted that this book
continues to echo and expand on my father’s work.”
—Natalie Rogers, PhD, Distinguished Consulting Faculty, Saybrook University, author, The Creative Connection: Expressive Arts as Healing

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John Sommers-Flanagan & Rita Sommers-Flanagan websiteVisit authors Sommers-Flanagan site for more information.
John & Rita Sommers-FlanaganVisit author John & Rita Sommers-Flanagan site for more information
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Sample Tip Sheets & Parent Homework Assignments 1.47 MB Click to Download
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