Dating - Philosophy for Everyone: Flirting With Big Ideas
January 2011, Wiley-Blackwell
- Offers amusing and enlightening philosophical insights into the dating game
- Helps demystify coupling in the 21st century for those young daters just entering the fray, and those veterans returning to the game
- Features contributions from a wide range of disciplines, including philosophy, psychology, communications, theology, economics, health sciences, professional ethics, and engineering and applied sciences
- Opens with Carrie Jenkins’ ground-breaking essay, The Philosophy of Flirting, first published in The Philosopher’s Magazine
Acknowledgments (Kristie Miller, University of Sydney and Marlene Clark, City University of New York).
Flirting with Big Ideas: An Introduction to Dating – Philosophy for Everyone (Kristie Miller, University of Sydney and Marlene Clark, City University of New York).
Part I: Getting Started: From Flirting to Dating:
1. The Philosophy of Flirting (Carrie S. Jenkins, University of Nottingham).
2. Good Girls Don’t, but Boys Don’t Either: Toward a Conservative Position on Male Flirting (Emily Langan, Wheaton College).
3. Love for Sale: Dating as a Calculated Exchange (Jennifer A. Samp, University of Georgia and Andrew I. Cohen, Georgia State University).
4. The Dating Elevator: Pushing the Right Buttons and Moving from Floor to Floor (John Rowan, Purdue University and Patricia Hallen, Purdue University).
Part II: No-No’s: Dating Taboos:
5. “Crazy in Love”: The Nature of Romantic Love (Mary Beth Yount, Duquesne University).
6. I’m Dating My Sister, and Other Taboos (Kristie Miller, University of Sydney).
7. Just Pushy Enough (Anne Barnhill, Johns Hopkins University).
8. Buy My Love: On Sex Workers, Gold Diggers, and “Rules Girls” (Kyla Reid, University of Sydney and Tinashe Dune, University of Sydney).
Part III: Rolling Right Along: Dating Like a Pro:
9. Against Matchmaking (Joshua S. Heter, St. Louis University).
10. Hitting the Bars with Aristotle: Dating in a Time of Uncertainty (Richard Paul Hamilton, University of Notre Dame Australia).
11. I’ve Never Been on a Date (yet Somehow I Got Married!) (Andrew Terjesen, Rhodes College).
12. Morality, Spontaneity, and the Art of Getting (Truly) Lucky on the First Date (Christopher Brown, National University of Singapore and David W. Tien, National University of Singapore).
Part IV: Another World: Cyber-Rendezvous:
13. Dating and Play in Virtual Worlds (Bo Brinkman, Miami University, Ohio).
14. How To Be Yourself in an Online World (Dan Silber, Florida Southern College).
Part V: From Date to Mate: “Natural” Selection?:
15. Evolutionary Psychology and Seduction Strategies: Should Science Teach Men How to Attract Women? (Hichem Naar, University of Manchester and Alberto Masala, University of Paris-Sorbonne).
16. Mating, Dating, and Mathematics: It’s All in the Game (Mark Colyvan, University of Sydney).
17. Why Less May Be More: Dating and the City (Marlene Clark, City University of New York).
Notes on Contributors.
Kristie Miller is a research fellow in philosophy at the University of Sydney, Australia. She is the author of Issues in Theoretical Diversity: Persistence, Composition and Time (2006) as well as numerous journal articles on related topics.
Marlene Clark is an Associate Professor of English at the City College Center for Worker Education, City University of New York. Her composition textbook, Juxtapositions: Ideas for College Writers (2005), is in its third edition.
Fritz Allhoff is an Assistant Professor in the Philosophy Department at Western Michigan University, as well as a Senior Research Fellow at the Australian National University’s Centre for Applied Philosophy and Public Ethics. In addition to editing the Philosophy for Everyone series, Allhoff is the volume editor or co-editor for several titles, including Wine & Philosophy (Wiley-Blackwell, 2007), Whiskey & Philosophy (with Marcus P. Adams, Wiley, 2009), and Food & Philosophy (with Dave Monroe, Wiley-Blackwell, 2007).
The essays in Dating: Flirting with Big Ideas presents an assortment of playful yet helpful essays about the dating world, and the philosophy and psychology behind the decision to step out into the field.
Speed dating, online dating, group blind dating, dating consultants, hotlines; the singles dating scene brings in more than a billion dollars a year in the U.S., and is booming with options. Should they dive headfirst into this pool of available mates, or wait out the tide for that perfect one to arrive on their doorstep (“Mating, Dating, and Mathematics: It’s All in the Game” and “Why Less May Be More: Dating and the City”)? And how can we treat our potential mates with respect, and come out the other side unscathed by the potentially shallow nature of modern dating?
Many single people have a checklist of traits that they are looking for in the ideal mate. This checklist can be easily uploaded to a dating website in the hopes of finding a perfect match. But do we really want a cookie cutter version of a mate, even if they fulfill all of our requirements? In his foreword journalist and author Joshua Wolf Shenk writes, “The desire to connect is the desire to jointly create a mutual reality that transcends our separate selves—and even, in ecstatic moments, obliterate them. But our only prayer at making these connections comes in holding onto our discrete identities.” The contributors carefully consider this philosophical need to balance and maintain an individual identity while also seeking someone to complement and amplify one’s own existence.
The contributors reveal the art of flirting (“The Philosophy of Flirting”), the all consuming nature of romantic love (“Crazy in Love”), illicit sex (“Buy My Love: On Sex Workers, Gold Diggers, & ‘Rules Girls’”), and your annoying friends who have “just the perfect guy/girl” for you to meet (“Against Matchmaking”).
The book includes five sections, and offers amusing, yet powerful, insights into building a relationship (Part I: Getting Started: From Flirting to Dating), avoiding the taboos and common faux pas of dating (Part II: No No's: Dating Taboos), becoming an expert (Part III: Rolling Right Along: Dating Like a Pro), cyber sex (Part IV: Another World: Cyber-Rendezvous), and the scientific, mathematical, and psychological rules of attraction (Part V: From Date to Mate: "Natural" Selection?).
The authors hail from a wide range of disciplines, including philosophy, psychology, communications, cognitive science, theology, economics, health sciences, professional ethics, mathematics, and computer science. They draw upon the Greek philosophies of love and sexuality (“Hitting the Bars with Aristotle: Dating in a Time of Uncertainty”), pop culture (references to Sex and the City, The Office, Say Anything, and The Notebook), and evolutionary psychology (“Evolutionary Psychology and Seduction Strategies: Should Science Teach Men How to Attract Women?”).