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The Painspotter's Guide to Broken Britain: 50 People to Love, Hate, Blame, Rate

ISBN: 978-1-907293-16-0
220 pages
April 2012, Capstone
The Painspotter
Welcome to Broken Britain!
MPs are blaming 'The System' for their thieving behaviour. Bankers have burnt through more cash than President Mugabe and still been bailed out. Britain is Broke. Only one thing's going to sort this mess out - some good old-fashioned finger pointing. It's time to take revenge... Painspotting style.

Let the Painspotting commence!
This book is more effective than Prozac and cheaper than therapy. You may be angry, you may be mad, you may even be institutionalised, but put the baseball bat away, hang up your lynching rope, and let the Painspotting commence!

50 of the best
Love them, hate them, blame them, rate them: The Painspotter's Guide to Broken Britain introduces the 50 most frightful characters you'll meet in a financial crisis, so prepare to laugh out loud at the Frightened Fat Cat, the Miserable Middle Class, the Self-help Saddo and many more.

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The end of boom and bust.

Acknowledgements.

Let the bad times roll.

The About to Retire Retiree.

The Bailout Beggar.

The Buy-to-Let Basket Case.

The Cash Finder.

The Celebrity Money Saver.

The Cohabiting Divorce.

The Conspicuous Consumer.

The Credit Crunch Scrounger.

The Deadbeat Debtor.

The Desperate Estate Agent.

The Disposed of Worker (previously known as Our Most Important Asset).

The Downwardly Mobile.

The Dubai Deserter.

The Economic Rioter.

The Economically Stressed.

The Elusive Tax Evader.

The Escaping Entrepreneur.

The Ex, Expat.

The Extended (to breaking point) Family.

The Financial Oracle.

The Frightened Fat Cat.

The Good Lifer.

The Gravy Train Politician.

The Grumpy Undergraduate.

The Humbled (but still incredibly wealthy) Bank Boss.

The Irate Investor.

The Living Big Loser.

The Low-Bonus Banker.

The Miserable Middle Class.

The Newly Liberated.

The No Responsibility Regulator.

The Not Quite Such a Master of the Universe.

The Nuevo Altruist.

The Organic Food Fly-by-night.

The Out of Touch Politician.

The Outbound Immigrant.

The Petty Thief.

The Pissed-off State Pensioner.

The Ponzi Schemer.

The Pseudo Rich.

The Relegated Rich.

The Repossessed.

The Savvy Squatter.

The Secure Civil Servant.

The Self-help Sado.

The Self-righteous Tightwad.

The Taxed to Death.

The Unabashed Bankrupt.

The Worthless Degree Holder.

Afterword – The Blame Game.

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ANDREW HOLMES is someone who is deeply affected by everyone around him – mainly negatively, you understand. This is a man who deliberately fills up his glass so that it’s always half-empty, as it gives him something to complain about. When he is not scowling at people in the street, you will find him living in a bivouac in an ancient Hampshire forest, well away from the credit crunch.

DAN WILSON is trained as a transforming robot Jedi ninja and regularly scribbles over boundaries betwixt low and high brow art. A fan of decreating remolicious words, he has won innumerable awards for nothing special and hopes to achieve inter-spatial awareness sometime soon. Dan lives with his family in a post-postmodern treehouse, and plans on retiring to the Sea of Tranquility in the 25th Century.

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